CAREFULLY observing amendments proposed by TDs to new renting laws in Ireland, unscrupulous landlord and all round gift to humanity Ronan Trenton admitted he now feared for his ability to pack 30 Brazilian students into each room in his hovel recently described on a Daft posting as ‘the next evolution in spacious living’.
“If this goes through, I’ll have to treat these foreign students no one really cares about like human beings. This is nanny state political correctness gone mad, I’m a business man for God sake” an irate Trenton, who had just got done painting a window on the wall, said.
Under proposed amendments renters’ right would could be bolstered with the Residential Tenancies Board given the ability to impose sanctions on landlords.
“The Brazilian girls don’t mind being 14 to a single bed, or that their shower is technically just me with a hose, some soap and a lovely big sponge,” Trenton added.
Visibly distressed and now on the verge of a panic attack, WWN reminded the landlord that with the current government in charge he had nothing to worry about as no meaningful policies which would grant renters proper rights would ever be signed off on.
“Haha, sorry, I was being hysterical. You’re right, I’m being silly,” Trenton conceded as he showed us around one of the many luxurious slums he owns and operates.
“I’m fair decent to them. I don’t charge them for oxygen…anymore,” added Trenton, while thanking the Irish public for knowing that this sort of stuff goes on all the time, but minding their own business anyway.