Dubliners Assured We Know What They Mean

THERE is no longer a need for people from Dublin to enquire ‘d’you know what I mean?’ at the end of every sentence, after the nation came together to stress that they heard them the first time.

“We know what you mean, you don’t have to ask,” came the impassioned plea from the nation, following over 100 years of Dubs double-checking.

“Believe us, 99.5% of the time, what you’re saying isn’t complicated, we’re rarely left in need of additional information. Also it always seemed pointless to ask us ‘do you know what I mean?’ but not wait to see if we do or don’t- if you’re just going to launch immediately into another stream of nonsense, just don’t bother asking”.

The survey also determined that:

– People in Dundalk need to clarify which town is ‘the’ town.

– The statement, ‘come here, listen to me’- most common in the Midlands and parts of the west, is not necessary when speaking to someone who is already close to you. Rule of thumb; if they can hear you say ‘listen’, they’re listening already.

– Similarly, ‘sure look’ is to be phased out at the earliest opportunity. Sure look at what?

– The ageist, misogynistic ‘boy’ greeting of Cork people is to be replaced with something more gender inclusive.