How To Pass Time While You Wait 11 Hours In A&E

HEADING to A&E? You may need to plan ahead, as waiting times in emergency departments around the country have reached an average of 11 hours, so before they load you into that ambulance you may need to pack up some of the following:

1) A deck of cards

Unlike a phone, tablet, laptop, Nintendo Switch or old-school Sega Game Gear, a deck of cards will provide hours of entertainment without having to worry about battery life or wifi.

Hell, if you get a game going with any of the other dozens of people waiting for urgent care, you might even win a few quid out of it. See, it’s not so bad!

2) A book

Wait, make that books, plural. Eleven hours is a long time, so you could make some decent inroads into your reading while you have the chance.

No family allowed to stay with you, so you don’t have any distractions, minimal physical effort required to turn pages so you don’t have to fear that you’re going to make whatever ailment you’re in for any worse than it already is… in fact if you bring a medical textbook with you, you may even diagnose what’s wrong with you before you ever see a doctor!

3) Condoms

Hey, you never know.

4) A George Foreman grill

And a Nespresso machine too, otherwise you’re at the mercy of vending machines. Wouldn’t you rather be enjoying a succulent, lean chicken breast and a cup of nice coffee? You have to be smart about these things. If you’re going to get suddenly ill in Ireland, you have to plan ahead.

Please remember that these guidelines are based on the average wait of 11 hours – that’s an average, far from the upper limit. If you’re waiting 20 hours in cork, you’re on your own.