“Trust Parents” Says Archbishop, Contradicting Centuries Of Catholic Church Teachings

SPEAKING OUT about the need to have religious sacraments such as Communions and Confirmations return to churches, Archbishop of Dublin Dermot Farrell said that the government must ‘trust parents’ that they won’t then stage large family gatherings against public guidelines* to mark the occasion.

The revelation that trusting parents is something the Church suddenly encourages is set to revolutionise how the Catholic Church operates in Ireland going forward.

“Well no, don’t trust them on that,” explained a Church spokesperson when asked if parents of children abused by priests should be trusted when they criticise religious orders still refusing to pay as part of redress schemes.

“No, that’s not what I meant” when asked if parents concerns over the new Maternity Hospital and the make up of its board and the influence of the Church should be listened to.

“Definitely not that,” when asked if parents who were forced into Mother and Baby Homes should be trusted label the report into the Homes as a whitewash and complete denial of justice and the reality of what took place there.

“Oh definitely not,” when asked if parents can be trusted when they say they want a complete separation between Church and State in the Irish education system.

“N-o no,” when asked if a mother carrying a child with a fatal foetal abnormalilty can be trusted.

“Again, no” when asked if parents who had their children taken from them by the Church and sold illegally in a clear example of human trafficking, should be trusted when they condemn such things.

“Yes, definitely, yes, just for that and nothing else” when asked if parents should be trusted when they back the Church’s lobbying to have public health guidelines changed so Communions can come back.

*Perfectly okay to have gatherings if you have them at the Merrion Hotel, your name is Katherine Zappone and important people are in attendance.