Investigation Launched After Man Gets Vaccine But Doesn’t Mention It On Social Media


GARDAÍ in Waterford are responding to claims that a local man has yet to triumphantly post any mention of getting a Covid-19 vaccine online, sparking fears that others may follow suit.

“How are we supposed to know which friends we can safely hangout with if they don’t plaster their confirmation card all over social media like a tagged sheep,” a worried friend and neighbour of the man put.

Believed to have received his first dose yesterday evening, the unnamed man is expected to be placed under Garda and community surveillance until he makes the effort to tell the whole world that he has received his dose on some form of social media.

“It’s like he’s not bothered showing anyone that he’s one of the billion plus people around the world to receive the vaccine which is very worrying,” another concerned friend gave, “how he’s resisting the urge to boast about how compliant he is, is beyond all hive-minded comprehension”.

Such was the concern behind the man’s lack of uniform public confirmation, Health Minister Stephen Donnelly was forced to break his silence on the matter, after being advised to only speak when told to by the Taoiseach on Covid matters after several dozen faux pas.

“I would urge everyone to post up their vaccine confirmation to social media… trampolines,” said Donnelly, before being smothered by an adviser with a chloroform rag and dragged away before disgracing the government again.