Save Thousands On Your Wedding Costs By Accepting That Nobody Gives A Fuck

ENGAGED couples are constantly looking for ways to make sure their special day is just that; special. But every little extra adds to the overall cost of the day, every finishing touch, everything that ‘just says you’. So how can you save hundreds, if not thousands from your wedding budget, if you want the day to be extra special?

Simple, just accept that nobody except you gives one single lonesome fuck about any of it.

Common matrimonial money-traps including ‘wedding favours’, personalised menus or an extra bridesmaid can all be eradicated if both the bride and groom-to-be sit down and take a long, hard look at themselves and ‘cop the fuck on’, according to wedding specialist and long-time single person Marion Shields.

“I get hundreds of young couples through the door every year, worrying about how they’ll be able to afford to have a pen made with their names on it for every guest at their wedding,” said Shields, speaking candidly to WWN.

“Cold hard fact of the matter is that nobody gives a fuck. People don’t go to weddings to check that the groomsmen are all wearing matching socks, people don’t go to a wedding to make sure that the flowers on the pew-ends in the church match the flowers that the groom gave the bride when he picked her up for their debs ten years ago. Nobody gives a fuck. Couples can half the price of their wedding if they just focus on what guests really want; a good feed, and a drinking session”.

Shields went on to admit that hiring a wedding advisor is another needless expenditure, adding that people who were ‘too dense’ to plan a wedding on their own shouldn’t be allowed to get married in the first place.