Truss Has ‘Only Days Left’ To Finish Off Britain


WITH newly installed Chancellor-until-next-week Jeremy Hunt reversing the vast majority of tax cuts she recently heralded with much fanfare, political experts are suggesting Liz Truss has just days to finish off Britain before being forced into resigning.

Despite stating she will only accept a P45 from the ghost of Margaret Thatcher herself, Truss is running out of time if her vision of a completely obliterated economy and country is to be achieved.

“With her economic policies ripped up by Hunt, the PM has to fall back on her effortless charm and brio to complete the task at hand; making Britain look like the apocalypse scenes in Terminator 2: Judgement Day,” shared one Whitehall insider.

“In all likelihood Tory MPs are hours away from telling Liz she is being sent to live out her political days on a pork markets farm in Norwich so it really is now or never if she’s truly serious about crashing the pound, prompting another interest rate hike and turning London into Zimbabwe-on-Thames,” added one commentator.

Truss was scheduled to tank the British stock market again with her answers to prime ministers questions earlier today but was unable to attend after suffering a dizzy spell from her successful world attempt for most u-turns in a week.

“She has her doubters, but I think Liz can fit in another 18 mini-budgets and an IMF bailout before she’s kicked out of No.10, we’ll miss these uncharacteristically chaotic times once a new Tory PM is in place,” offered one expert, just thankful Labour aren’t in charge.