Day Out In Bray Ruined By Day Out In Bray

PEOPLE complaining about the chaos that marred the annual Bray Air Show ‘should have known better’ than to expect a fun day out in Ireland without something ruining it, according to a report about yesterday’s fiasco in Wicklow.

“It was the first Bray Air Show back after a two-year absence, great weather was expected, and families were really looking forward to it. This thing had ‘official enquiry’ written all over it from the start,” said one observer, amid reports that passengers stuck on sweltering DART trains had to prise the doors open to avoid suffocation after hour-long delays on the tracks.

“You have to feel sympathy for Irish Rail too, I mean how could they have known that large amounts of people would want to avail of public transport to a big family day out on the one and only train line to the destination? Or indeed that there would be an All-Ireland final on at the same time – those things spring out of nowhere”.

Learnings made from yesterday’s harrowing family day out include:

– Future fun days out should be advertised simply as ‘days’, as ‘fun’ is by no means assured and advertising as such may lead to legal action

– When planning on attending an event in Ireland, assume that all public transport will fail and make your arrangements accordingly. A personal camel, for example, would have easily carried a family of four over the mountains to Bray yesterday.

– Parents of small children should know that said kids don’t care for air shows, zoos, festivals, fairs, or indeed anything that doesn’t involve screens. Sit at home and give them an iPad. Save yourself some heartache.