THE DATING app Tinder has acted quickly following the news the owners of Coppers nightclub on Dublin’s Harcourt Street have put their landmark shifting venue and hotel up for sale.
Echoing tech giant Facebook’s approach to rivals which saw them purchase WhatsApp and Instagram for vast sums of money, Tinder has spent big on securing their main competition in the Irish marketplace when it comes to being the ideal way for singletons to meet and exchange saliva.
As Tinder seeks to solidify its place in the ‘physical dating world’ in a move that sees them venture offline, the rumoured $4 billion aggressive acquisition of Coppers could be the first of many purchases.
At a staggering $4 billion, many business experts say they have vastly underpaid for a place that is widely regarded as ‘gas craic’ or ‘hell on Earth’ depending on who you talk to.
“As our users can from time to time get a little sick of the Tinder swiping experience we’ve had to change our business model slightly,” confirmed one Tinder executive, who wouldn’t comment on rumours they have also bought several parish discos, all school bike sheds, corners outside local shops, several office stationery cupboards and other prominent shifting locations.
Coppers patrons fearing that their favourite night spot will undergo changes have been told to cease worrying as Tinder plan on making minimal changes.
“Don’t worry, you’ll all get the shift and if you don’t you can still use us to lie about to impress your friends,” confirmed Tinder’s chief Washing Machine Method of Kissing expert.