Local Woman Would Have Shaved If She Had Known She’d Be Getting The Ride Tonight


CORK CITY native Nessa O’Dowda has cursed her misfortune after pairing off with a man at a local pub on a day during which she made a snap decision not to shave.

“I was just in from work, had to make dinner and then meet the girls for 8pm in town,” confirmed O’Dowda (27) who just hadn’t factored in the possibility of getting the ride on tonight of all nights.

While the man partaking in the riding, John Hyland (25), made no mention of bodily hair throughout the course of their three epic minutes of sexual congress, O’Dowda maintains her belief that had she known, she would have no doubt shaved.

“There’s nothing ‘overdue’ a go of a razor blade per say, but I know there’s hair there,” O’Dowda explained possibly alluding to the growth of hair on her shins and thighs.

“It’s not for his benefit I’d do it, it’s just for me, otherwise I’m just not in the moment ya know, my legs feel like cheese graters,” confirmed O’Dowda who became fixated by every single occasion her body brushed against Hyland’s body in any way.

Hyland for his part, made his own omission.

“Christ, if I’d known I was going to get the ride at all I would have gone to the gym at least once in the last year or two,” Hyland confirmed to WWN, his face wearing every shameful moment his formless tube-like body must have been witnessed by O’Dowda.