Dublin City Council Gets Go Ahead For Junkie Cull

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THE Government has approved a ‘junkie cull’ which will see as many as 8,000 drug users exterminated from Dublin’s inner city over the next twelve months.

Dublin City Council will host the pilot scheme until July 2015, before a decision is made on whether to extend the cull nationwide.

There are an estimated 20,000 drug addicts living in Dublin alone.

“The main problem here is what these people are doing to our vital tourism trade ” Stated minister for the environment Phil Hogan. “We don’t have a problem with the junkies themselves or what they’re doing. They’re just making the place unsightly is all. It gives a bad impression to tourists arriving here when they see jaundice faced zombies hobbling around our nice cobbled streets.”

Over 200 city council workers have already been specially trained over the last 6 months in administering lethal injections to the cities unwanted drug users.

“They usually think they’re getting a free fix at first.” said council worker Mark Chambers. “You can’t help but feel sorry for them when they look up at you. They see the syringe with their little excited eyes and it can be heartbreaking at times.

“It’s like shooting fish in a barrel really. The first few put downs are tough, but at the end of the day; you have to remind yourself it’s just a job.”

Irelands heroin problem has quadrupled since the credit crunch, forcing the government to now consider a nationwide cull.

If successful, the junkie cull will be rolled out to all major Irish towns and cities by 2016, at an estimated cost of €10 million euros.

Earlier we spoke to Taoiseach Enda Kenny, who was signing off on a new €54 million boat for the Irish Navy at the Irish Naval Service headquarters in Dublin.

“One syringe of barbiturates costs the taxpayer just four euros.” he pointed out. “Treating an addict over a ten year period can cost over €10,000 euros. It’s safe to say the math speaks for itself.

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