Large Increase In Number Of Prison Inmates Opting For Banking Related Courses

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THE Central Applications Office (CAO) has reported a significant increase in the number of prison inmates opting for banking related courses.

Figures show that compared  to last year, there’s a 67% jump in convicted criminals hoping to study financial subjects this September.

“Usually inmates here in Mountjoy take up practical subjects like construction, as most of them haven’t completed the leaving cert,” said chief educational officer Martin Ford. “Inmates this year now want a career in banking or some other form of financial accounting.”

Out of the 500 detainee’s who applied to the prison education scheme this year, 487 opted for a banking related college course.

“It just looks good is all,” 24-year-old inmate Teddy Jones told WWN earlier. “They’d do be’s robbin’ an’ all and not ever haven’ to go to the clink. Seems like a no brainer to me. Loadsa money in it too. Snortin’ bag and bangin’ brassers. Ya gotta think of the long game man, ja’knowha’ I mean?”

Under Irish law, students must have completed their leaving cert in order to apply for a college place. However, financial related courses can be offered by the CAO if the applicant can meet a certain aptitude for the sector.

“Basically they will have to have little or no conscience, be ruthless, narcissistic and willing to annihilate anyone who gets in their way.” explained CAO spokesman James Phelan.

Just over 98% of prison applicants who applied this year met the courses criteria.

 

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