Disgusting Parents Pressuring Kids Into ‘Cute Viral Video’ Sweatshops



An FBI investigation into several recent viral videos has uncovered some shocking secrets kept from internet users the world over, WWN has learned.

Earlier today as many at 60 different sets of parents have been arrested for enrolling their children a gruelling sweatshop-like course; on which children are forced into making viral video hits in the hope that it earns their parents lucrative sponsorship and commercial deals.

Many of the most beloved viral hits involving children are actually staged and fabricated with the sole purpose of generating income for pushy and callous parents.

“I haven’t seen anything like this in my 22 years at the FBI,” shared a visibly distraught Garret McGrath. The agent went on to tell WWN some of the more harrowing details before breaking down.

A state of the art recording studio complex was shut down by the FBI in Oregon with as many as 150 children taken into care by authorities following evidence of large scale ‘viral video bootcamps’ taking place.

One such child released was from the immensely popular ‘Listen, listen, listen Linda’ video in which a child appears to argue with his mother, mimicking both her cadence and her approach to parenting while sounding impossibly adorable.

The child, whose identity must remain protected, spoke of his relief at being freed. “I have perfect diction despite what the video had you believe. 4 weeks before we shot what was to become a viral video I was forced into a room with an acting coach. For hours he screamed instructions ‘more adorable’, ‘you stutter like an amateur’ and ‘get funny or die trying’. It was truly upsetting and horrible.”

The child then spoke of how the children would be forced into boxes at night and forced to sleep standing up. The scam is said to have netted parents as much as $10 million in YouTube payments over the last year.

Such is the relentless ‘news’ cycle pursued by online publications, the demand for viral content has never been higher. Admittedly the vast majority of viral videos are too funny, but after the revelations today it is clear they come at a cost.

“If we had arrived 5 minutes sooner we could have saved little Jacob’s lives,” a teary-eyed Agent McGrath told reporters, “he was playing the part of a child at their birthday party who falls asleep in his cake but he suffocated during the 36-take. They found icing in his lungs. I’m I can’t…” Agent McGrath broke down in tears for a final time.