State With Track Record Of Getting Hacked Says It Can Be Trusted To Roll Out Online ID System For Young People
MINISTER FOR Media Patrick O’Donovan has announced the government’s intention to ape Austrlia’s recent move to limit internet access for children by rolling out a new digital wallet for online age verification, something endorsed by companies like Meta and opposed by anyone who possesses knowledge of the HSE hack, and how poorly resourced the National Cyber Security Centre is.
“All I know is if a company that’s been complicit in ethnic cleansing in Myanmar think our plans are a good idea then we’re going to be just fine,” shared a government spokesperson, who can’t think of a reason why it could backfire to require the nation to store personal information with the state and tech companies.
“We want to keep our young people safe from harm online and by getting the approval of Meta, a company that identified teenage girls who had deleted selfies on Facebook, Instagram, and WhatsApp and forwarded their data to companies who used the data to target the girls with beauty products, we must be on the right track,” added the spokesperson.
Asked if they had considered using their powers to impose legislation that would properly regulate big tech companies the government confirmed that it’s much more fun setting up a backdoor mass surveillance system of its citizens instead.
Elsewhere, tech experts pondered if there was another option that could involve ‘offline intervention’, by a set of people uniquely qualified to monitor children.
“This group would be put in charge of permitting or restricting childrens’ access to the internet, we could give them a title, maybe from the Latin ‘pario’ which mean ‘to give birth to’, and these people, let’s call them ‘parents’ could monitor all this. And then on the government side, if a tech firm is not stopping children joining their applications, the government could grow a spine and fine them into oblivion. That all seems easier than setting up a surveillance state, doesn’t it?” offered one expert.
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