“‘All Together Now’ Line Up Looks Class” Say Man Who’ll Spend Weekend Puking His Ring Up In Medical Tent

“BEST LINE UP in years for proper music heads, barely any commercial shit that attracts the bellends” local music fan Ian McDorman said, celebrating this year’s full line up announcement for All Together Now which he will miss the entirety of due to his attendance at the festival’s medical tent.

The 25-year-old spent much of yesterday evening marshaling friends into a dedicated ‘ATN25 motherfuckers!’ WhatsApp group, imploring everyone to beg, borrow and steal money if they’re broke because this is one festival line up they can’t miss.

However, after downing a crate and double dropping, McDorman most definitely can and will miss everything and retain only the vaguest memories of the white canvas roof of a medical tent and a kindly nurse that reassures him his wellies aren’t trying to eat his feet.

“My big fear is that there’s so many class bands that they’ll end up clashing and being on at the same time on different stages, grrr that’s the worst, isn’t it?” McDorman texted into the group, made up of friends who will spend the weekend texting ‘where you at? Fontaines on in 10 man, we’re behind the pole with the couple having a domestic’.

Vomit covered and crawling towards anyone in a hi-vis jacket, McDorman will at least have girlfriend Meave Corley by his side at all times.

“Sorry babe,” Corley is expected to tell McDorman as he pukes up his innards, flees the medical tent at speed so she doesn’t miss a second of CMAT’s set.

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