IDF Condemn Vile Hamas Ceremony, Point Out They’ve Been Very Respectful Of 46,000 Palestinians They’ve Murdered

THE PARADING of the coffins of dead Israeli children by Hamas amid scenes of cheering has been met with near universal disdain and condemnation.

Reacting to the events the IDF issued a number of statements, making the distinction between their just and moral actions in combat compared to the barbarism unique to Hamas, Lords of the Desert and Palestinian Mujahideen Movement terrorists.

“We’re not animals like them. At least when IDF soldiers literally raped a Palestinian detainee to death in Sde Teiman we had the good grace and decency not to film and broadcast it,” confirmed the IDF, an army which is also credited with making Gaza home to the most child amputees per capita in the world.

In the wake of Hamas’s macabre ceremony those advocating for a permanent end to the killing of Palestinian civilians reportedly feel ‘pretty silly’ in thinking the IDF is also wrong in committing an endless parade of war crimes.

“Of the over 46,000 Palestinians we’ve killed, can you recall any celebrations? Or any sordid visual metaphors like we’ve seen with Hamas, that show how corroded the soul and humanity of our enemy is?” asked the spokesperson for an army that invites people to sign the side of missiles before they are sent to murder innocent civilians.

The actions of Hamas have led the Israeli government to delay the release of over 600 Palestinians, held without charge, who won’t be referred to as hostages.

“We have recently successfully kicked 40,000 people out of their homes in the West Bank, an area we are illegally occupying, and we will not permit any of them to return, but do we stage an unsightly and unedifying celebration over it? No,” confirmed the IDF, during a media briefing in one of the West Bank homes they have taken over, draped in Israeli flags and posed for photos with Benjamin Netanyahu in.