Taoiseach Urged To Use EU Presidency To Get Charleen Murphy Back In Love Island Villa

MICHEÁL MARTIN has been urged to stop wasting speeches at EU parliament on frivolous issues like AI, the climate and security and do all he can to ensure Irish influencer Charleen Murphy can walk back on Love Island after she was disgracefully dumped from the villa.

“We will make every effort to get Charleen back in there but with it being a non-EU produced show, although filmed in Spain, it’s a difficult bureaucratic knot,” Martin said when being door stepped by a group of 500 Love Island viewers fueled by nothing except Jacob’s Creek and share bags of Doritos.

Murphy, devastatingly given the heave-ho by contestant Kavan Murphy, now faces a flight home and an inbox full of yet more requests from brands to endorse any old shite but fans remain livid by the events.

“See your man who gave her the cold shoulder. Surely the Irish government can step in; this prick is named after an Irish county he can’t spell? No, not allowed. We should revoke his surname from him and all,” shared the activist group Charleen On Me.

“Pah, Micheál calls himself a leader. When the US get a player sent off in the World Cup, their fella steps up and steps in, the people won’t except this half-arsed ‘I’ll se what I can do’. Government jet touching down outside the villa pronto or we’ll take to the streets, what’s the point in the EU presidency if we can’t use it for the stuff that really matters like this,” added the activists.