Greek Coastguard To Teach RNLI How To Throw Refugees To Their Death As Part Of EU Migration Pact


WITH Ireland opting into the controversial EU Migration Pact by a margin of 79 votes to 72, moves have already been made to ensure the Emerald Isle follows suit in how the EU at large deals with migrants.

“Make sure to oil your boots so they can’t grab onto it while it’s on their head drowning them,” a Greek veteran coastguard explained to an induction class of horrified RNLI rescuers attending a course in Dublin this morning as part of the new pact training scheme.

According to multiple eyewitnesses, the Greek coastguard has caused the deaths of dozens of migrants in the Mediterranean over a three-year period and ignoring countless distress calls making them highly experienced when it comes curbing refugee numbers.

“Throwing these people to their deaths is far cheaper than rescuing them, but just make sure to check their shade of skin colour first as we wouldn’t want you to drown any Ukrainians by accident as they’re worth a few bob thanks to EU funding for them,” the demonstrator told the room, now holding a large harpoon, “these things are great for sinking dinghies but I’m sure you guys will come up with your own ways of dealing with them,” he added as several RNLI members wretched into sick bags provided by the Greek coastguard team.

“You’ll get used to it guys, don’t worry – I actually don’t hear the screams anymore in my nightmares,” the course leader concluded, before breaking for lunch.

Reaction to the training of the RNLI has been criticised by many.

“Waste of taxpayer money, the RNLI will never have to do this it happens so far away. So far away in fact you’d hardly even bother caring about it, or thinking it relates to Ireland at all,” confirmed one man who protested outside the US embassy when Donald Trump’s administration set up detention centres in the US for migrants during his time in power.