Jack Chambers Spends Entire Exchequer Funds On Roblox


JACK CHAMBERS may only be hours in his new job, but his first act as Minister for Finance has sent the government into panic mode after the 33-year-old maxed out the government credit card buying in-game purchases on Roblox.

“I’m sorry I didn’t know it was charging me every time,” a sobbing Chambers told his party leader Tánaiste Micheál Martin, who was frantically searching for a contact number for Roblox customer service in a bid to get back €24 billion worth of micro-transaction purchases.

Despite insisting that he was led astray and pressured by some older boys into buying them things on Roblox too, Chambers has been provisionally grounded meaning he can’t leave his Leinster House office.

The punishment is considered harsh by some government officials consider too harsh because on Wednesday’s the canteen does jelly and ice cream for dessert and that is Chambers’s favourite.

“I’ve the NTMA onto me Jack, what was the one thing I expressly warned you about? This was a? Exactly, a big grown up boy job. What the fuck are ‘VIP t-shirts’? What do you mean it’s not a real t-shirt? You spent the State’s entire cash supply and you’ve bought t-shirts you can’t even wear? Sweet merciful Christ,” an irate Martin said.

Department of Finance staff are now investigating if it’s possible to sell their remaining Robux on the black market, but early indications are that savvy 10-year-olds know how desperate the government’s position is and are offering 20 cent on the Euro.

UPDATE: A delivery driver has arrived at Leinster House wondering where he should leave €189,660 worth of Euro 2024 sticker packs?