Man Manages To Convey Utter Devastation At Earthquake Without Making Cheap Political Point


BELIEVED TO BE the first of its kind in Ireland, one local resident left virtually speechless by the devastation wrought by the earthquakes in Turkey and Syria has managed to convey his sorrow, solidarity and condolences and leave it at that.

“I’m just so sorry it’s happened – the news, I can barely watch it,” explained Damian Givans, who donated to emergency appeals rather than taking to internet forums and comments below news articles to project a distorted and cynical view of the world.

Givans shied away from trading cheap political points or inventing the scenario in his head in which he believed the catastrophe had received zero coverage in the media due to Ukraine.

Praised for his restraint Givans simply remarked ‘so, so, sad’ in friends and family WhatsApp groups and declined to drag in points about the New World Order, Climate Change, refugees, Russia, America, the EU and dozens of other bones of contention repeated and shared by others.

“Well, yeah of course, I’m not an asshole,” confirmed Givans.

“I know it’s tough for people these days, so I just donated what I could… I mean, what else… if I feel helpless I can only imagine what those people affected are going through,” said Givans, again not concerning himself with lightly coating the comment sections of the internet in fecal matter some people call their ‘brain cells at work’.

Elsewhere, Twitter user @wonthroughIrish32 spectacularly failed in this task as he pondered if the earthquake was caused by Covid vaccines.