Tiredness Kills Wins Tidy Towns Award

THE residents of Tiredness Kills are today celebrating their first ever tidy towns win after beating 800 Tidy Town committees who entered the 60th year of national competition.

Tiredness Kills, one of the Ireland’s newest towns, fought off the some of the country’s biggest contenders to secure the top place in nation’s most sought after prize.

“There was not one bit of rubbish in Tiredness kills, in fact it was spotless, as in, there was nothing there at all,” explained a tidy towns spokesman today, “in all my years judging this competition, I’ve never seen a town to be so clean, so tidy, it was a real honour to award Tiredness Kills with this years prize and I’ll admit it will be hard for any town to beat them next year at the level its at now.

Tiredness Kills’ minimalist layout was just one of the main factors in securing its win, with rival locations now already making plans to challenge the town in 2019.

“We’re just going to level everything so there is literally nothing left,” said Mayor of Dingle, Mark Tobin, “but it will be hard as Tiredness Kills is so small a town that if you blinked or closed your eyes for a second you’d miss passing through it”.