‘Hutch Kinahan: The Musical’ To Open This Week

A MUSICAL based on the ongoing Hutch/Kinahan feud in Dublin city will make its debut tonight in The Olympia Theatre and will continue every night for the foreseeable future, WWN can confirm.

Starring several high profile Irish actors, including Gabriel Byrne as Gerry ‘The Monk’ Hutch and Aidan Gillen as the notorious Christy Kinahan, the 2-hour musical has already sold out for its first 200 nights – an incredible achievement welcomed by its lead writer and crime reporter, Paul Williams, and co-writer Andrew Lloyd Webber.

“I’ll probably buy my own private island after this,” Williams joked, now counting piles of 100 euro notes, “I’m so glad we went down this route; crime lovers are sick of reading books and newspapers on this feud and want to be more entertained.

“When Andrew originally proposed the idea of a musical based on the Hutch/Kinahan story, I was a little dubious, but when I saw the figures and my take home after tax, I damn nearly jizzed my pants”.

With musical numbers like ‘Garda Resources Me Hole’, ‘Fat Freddy’s Drop’ and ‘Mistaken Identity’, Hutch Kinahan: The Musical is already set to smash previous box office records.

“Word has it the big man himself, Dapper Don, might even make the premier tonight,” Williams concluded, now tightening the velcro on his bullet proof vest.