5 People That Could Replace Robert Mugabe As WHO Goodwill Embassador


THE World Health Organisation (WHO) has caused a stir in recent days with its appointed of Zimbabwean leader Robert Mugabe to the position of a Goodwill Embassador despite the fact he is Robert Mugabe.

Responding to opposition and criticism of the appointment, the WHO has since rescinded its offer to Mugabe leaving a Goodwill Ambassador position vacant. A position which WWN Health feels can be filled by one of the five far more suitable candidates we have listed below.

PR missteps like the one the WHO has been guilty of are quite common, but they don’t need to be if expert advice, such as the advice coming from WWN Health, is heeded:

Josef Mengele

Famed for his barbaric experiments on men, women and children during the World War II, the WHO, could appoint Nazi doctor Josef Mengele. And if the WHO has mastered reanimating corpses, it would be a nice nod to Mengele’s zeal for experimentation that he is the first guinea pig and reanimated Goodwill Ambassador. And compared to Mugabe, this is a candidate who has a medical background, helping the WHO avoid accusations of appointing someone with zero relevant experience.

Stomach Bile

A discarded pile of stomach bile seems no more an unsuitable candidate than Robert Mugabe the more we think about it.

HSE Middle Management

It seems a shame that Ireland would seek to hoard its collection of middle managers, never using their expertise in increasing waiting lists, appointment cancellation, and trolley use in A&E with the outside world. The WHO could learn from their ability to create work from thin air, which prevents them from addressing the pressing issues of the day.

Gerry Adams

Like Mugabe, Adams is a controversial figure, and like Mugabe, Adams goes overseas for his medical treatment and these qualities seem like exactly the sort the WHO have been looking for.

Someone who has yet to tarnish their name and reputation

The Zimbabwean health system had initially seen improvements under Mugabe when he first took power. However, his decline into despotic habits have been widely reported for years. If the WHO were to take a leaf out of the Nobel Prize committee’s book, they would be well advised to pick a prominent figure who has yet to fuck up, but will obviously do so in the future.

Figures like Barack Obama and Aung San Suu were ushered in as Peace Prize winners only to undo all that promise in the intervening years. The WHO would be wise to choose a world leader, someone with high likeability before their fall from grace, WWN Health feels that someone such as Vladimir Putin or Donald Trump would be the ideal appointment.