Bank Of Mom And Dad Reject Son’s Loan Application


A GALWAY branch of Ireland’s largest home loan banking institution, the Bank of Mom and Dad has rejected 21-year-old Nathan Crainey’s application for a loan, WWN understands.

Citing previous issues with loan repayments as the reason behind the decision, joint-head loan risk assessor and board member of the bank, Sinead Crainey said she regretted having to make the decision, but “you can’t believe the little shit when he says he’ll pay you back”.

With outstanding payments running into the thousands, which relate to several separate loans for a 2015 J1 trip, some clothes and countless sessions Nathan’s poor credit rating is likely to see him struggle to raise the necessary funds for this coming summer.

“He has it down on his loan application that ‘going to the Euros would be fucking class’ and he’s not wrong, but we felt with our standard APR of 0% it really isn’t worth it for us,” confirmed loan processor Fergal Crainey.

It is expected that Nathan will make several amendments to his loan application before resubmitting it later this week.

Amendments included are believed to be ‘you know I’m good for it’, ‘Eamon’s parents gave him the money’ and ‘it’s not fair’.