North Korea Receive €4 Billion Order From Ireland For Hangover Free Alcohol
FOLLOWING news of North Korea’s breakthrough invention of hangover free alcohol comes news of the largest import order ever carried out by the Irish State, WWN has learned.
“This product was too good to turn down, I think the public will agree that no more hangovers is enough justification for us to ignore the litany of human rights abuses in North Korea,” said Noel Richards, a member of the team of Irish publicans that tested the alcohol while on a trade mission in North Korea.
“We got absolutely smashed, and not a hangover between us, it was quite emotional when we all woke up and realised we were hangover free. There were smiles, hugs and then floods of joyous tears,” Richards added.
While the Government led the trade mission to North Korea, the purchase of the alcohol has been privately funded by a number of old men who frequent the country’s bars.
One regular at a Waterford pub is believed to have given over 8 million euro of his own money to the cause. It is thought the total purchase of €4 billion’s worth of alcohol should see the country through until the end of the month.
A huge backlash from the public was feared, given the appalling conditions North Korea’s citizens live in, but the rumoured backlash has failed to materialise.
“Fuck them, if this means I don’t have to spend the weekend with my head in a toilet bowl, I’d sign off on killing a few people myself,” alcohol and craic enthusiast Ciara Kirwan told WWN.
It is thought hangover free alcohol will see sick days among Irish businesses reduced by a staggering 30,00%.