JobBridge Intern Plucking Up The Courage To Ask About A Full Time Position

39
0
Share:

JOBBRIDGE intern Kevin Murray spent much of the morning in the WWN toilets practicing a speech he hoped to give to his employers in which he would ungratefully state it is about time he was made permanent.

Kevin’s disgusting display of arrogance comes after just 12 short months of 100 hour weeks at the publication and only weeks after an unexplained absence after receiving the beautiful gift of a Charlie Hebdo T-shirt.

“You can do this Kev,” the Media Studies graduate said out loud as he paced about the toilets trying to psyche himself into requesting he be paid for the full time work he carries out.

Operating under the misguided belief that after 4,800 hours of work he was somehow entitled to a permanent position, Kevin was hoping to explain to his superiors why an underling with a masters degree could hope to just waltz into a full time position without any full time experience.

“What did we say about 2015?” Kevin said as he locked eyes with his reflection, reminding himself, he had promised himself that this year would be his year, “2015, Kevin gets mean,” he added fighting back a mix of nerves and tears.

Kevin then marched towards the office of WWN editor Paddy Browne with the intent of knocking on his door in a presumably violent and insolent manner. As he was about to knock he consulted some motivational phrases he had scribbled on his hand only to have a last second change of heart.

The JobBridge intern was then spotted by a coworker hovering at the WWN editor’s door.

“Shit for brains, it’s nearly 12 and I know you haven’t cleaned the vomit off the toilet floor,” shouted Terry Bull, “I know this because I literally just did it a minute ago, there’s some shit on the floor too but that’s not mine, honest”.

Share:
X