Man Sexually Assaulted By Woman Declared ‘Total Legend’ By Mates

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LOCAL Waterford man James Hallion (24) felt the stinging pain of nonstop high fives from enthusiastic friends as he told an epic story of being out on the pull last night.

“She just wouldn’t leave me alone,” James said to rapturous hollering from his group of male friends as he began detailing how irresistible, on occasion, he can be to the opposite sex.

James attempted to give a detailed account of events but was shouted down by friends who wanted him to skip to the juicy details.

“Did you get the fucking ride or not,” was just one of several well meaning and badgering questions from his friends.

“Well, we were out in the smoking area after she insisted on us doing shots,” James added much to the approval of his friends who had previously questioned his ‘game’ when it came to the ladies.

“I’ll be honest – I was locked, but I’m almost sure she pinned me against the wall,” he added to the ever-loudening enthusiasm of his friends.

“Dirty minx,” quipped friend Mike as he leaned in with anticipation.

“Next thing I know she rammed her hand down my pants and, you know,” James said, avoiding all eye contact.

After the loud cheers died down, Mike inquired as to the woman’s performance in the bedroom while James remained sheepish, finding himself feeling ill presumably due solely to the alcohol consumed the previous night.

“Well, I kind of felt sick so I left and jumped in a taxi home,” James said much to the dismay of the assembled friends.

“Fucking hell! You were this close to getting your hole and you pulled a legger. Jesus, you must feel like a right idiot,” bellowed friend Sean, “can’t believe you scored last night and didn’t seal the deal”.

“Me neither,” added a despondent James.

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