Council Didn’t Bother Its Hoop Collecting Derelict Site Levies, Just Gonna Raise Local Business Rates Instead


OVERWHELMED from avoiding all the work it’s meant to do, Waterford County Council is expected to keep on raising business rates in the hopes it offsets the shortfall from not collecting levies on derelict sites and of course its own mismanagement of the county budget every year, WWN has learned.

“Who cares, it’s only twenty-odd derelict sites,” a Council source defended, ignoring the other 1,600 vacant properties in Waterford County conveniently not on their list, the majority of which have been sitting levy-free for over a decade and now slowly changing Waterford’s tourism tagline to ‘Ireland’s oldest derelict city’.

“Loads of the other local authorities didn’t collect theirs either, so what you want us to do; collect the money owed to the local exchequer and make our pals look stupid? That’s not how Ireland is run,” our source added, breaking for lunch for a couple of hours.

With half the city looking like a Nevada Desert nuke town after a series of atomic economic bombs destroyed any remaining SMEs, only multi-national pubs, discount stores, phone repair shops and cafes remain along with a handful of ‘lucky ones’ who are barely surviving.

“When you put aside the fact every second shop is to let, the city centre is overrun with people who’ve been kicked out of emergency accommodation for the day and entire streets like Lady Lane are left derelict, you kind of just get used to it, boy!” city centre shop owner Mossey Power explains,

“Of course, the council could lower business rates, issue compulsory purchase orders on sites escaping levies – you know, actually do their jobs – but they’ve a tonne of photocalls and entertaining with taxpayer’s money to do with real politicians returning from Dublin for the day,” adding, “sod heaps for overpriced and poorly yet-to-be-built developments don’t turn themselves you know”.