Cillian Murphy Issues ‘Would You Ever Fuck Off’ Plea To Celeb Selfie Hunters


IRISH ACTING legend Cillian Murphy has issued a ‘would you ever fuck off’ plea to everyone trying to get selfies with him in public as he just tries to go about his daily life.

In a WWN exclusive copy and pasted article from a range of websites that copy and pastes everything, this time from Rolling Stone, we have cherry picked a small section from a wide-ranging interview quoting it out of context in the hopes of causing a stir.

“They’re expecting Tommy Shelby and that’s not me but they’ll fucking get a razor blade to the throat if they keep asking for photos while I’m trying to order a chicken fillet roll in my local Spar,” explained Murphy.

The Oppenheimer star admitted to being mentored by fellow Corkonian Roy Keane on how to interact with over eager fans.

“I fantasise about turning up to these peoples’ homes at 7am as they wearily take out the bins in their pyjamas and demanding selfies from them, how would you like that Susan! Sorry that wasn’t very Chillian Murphy of me,” added Murphy, his dreamy blue eyes doing that thing were they transform into the nightmarish blue eyes of a psychopath.

It was at this point we sought to end the interview.

“Don’t you want to hear more about my craft, my acting, what motivates me, why I get up in the mornings, why art is more vital then ever as the age of AI descends on us,” queried Murphy as we hurriedly packed up our things.

“Nah we’re grand, we’ve got enough for a clickbait headline so we’ll be on our way,” we concluded.