How To Solve The Drone Problem At Dublin Airport

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A SCOURGE of the skies, delaying flights and causing chaos, the aviation industry has repeated calls for the government to enhance laws and provide more resources in order to bring an end to drone flights interfering with the operation of Dublin Airport.

But just how could such a thing be achieved? WWN spoke to a number of experts who provided us with the following solutions:

Suicide bomber seagulls. It’s long time we weaponised the seagull population in Dublin and aimed them at drones.

Recruit and pay youths who throw rocks at emergency response vehicles to target drones instead.

Tell the nearest xenophobic anti-immigrant protest that the drone was imported from Albino or Georgia, America.

If the military can hack into the drone’s controls simply hand control over to Ryanair staff, who would ensure the drones are parked miles away from the entrance of any departures gate.

Bring in US airport security on a one-day work exchange programme and cover your ears as they shotgun blast the sky. Give advance warning to passenger going through security checks that body searches will be a little more invasive on this day too.

Actually verify that a drone is in the area surrounding the airport before shutting down flights, which turned out not to be the case during last Friday’s flight suspensions.

Threaten the perpetrators with draconian prison sentences such as being burned at the stake or being tied to a luggage conveyor belt and forced to listen to the Ryanair trumpet music for a decade.

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