Woman Who Doesn’t Like ‘The Snapper’ Has Head Shaved By Mob, Chased Out Of Village

A LOCAL woman has been run out of her village by a pitch-fork wielding mob of angry savages, after admitting that she ‘never really cared’ for the sacred 1993 adaptation of Roddy Doyle’s ‘The Snapper’.

Sheila McGuigham, 37, was set upon by a group consisting of villagers including some of her friends and family, who beat and kicked her before shaving her head bare with a shears, chasing her up the road while she wore ‘doesn’t like The Snapper’ scrawled on her torn shirt in red paint.

The banishment comes following a recent screening on RTÉ of the movie, a gritty kitchen sink drama about a girl who falls pregnant after a rape with one funny line about a Pakistani postman in it.

Having listened to friends and co-workers and social media commentators go ‘on and on’ about how amazing the low-budget film was, McGuigham casually mentioned that she didn’t really care for the way it glossed over the attack of the main character, or the loutish ‘few pints sorts everything’ portrayal of inner city Dublin families, or indeed the way they drive down Clonliffe road heading towards Fairview on their way to the Rotunda from Kilbarrack.

“Not welcome here,” was all we managed to get out of the villagers as they watched a bawling McGuigham stumble up the road to find shelter somewhere else.

“Her and her kind. Not welcome here”.

In a last bid to remain in her home, Ms. McGuigham pleaded that she ‘loves The Commitments’, but this fell on deaf ears.