Dáil Lotto Syndicate Done With Chasing TDs For Their €3

“THAT Noonan is the worst of them” grumbled Michael Gerahty, a Dáil barman who runs the twice-weekly Lotto syndicate which can be entered by TDs from any party.

“Oh, ‘I haven’t got it on me now, but I’ll get you on the double at the weekend’, fucking chancer”.

Gerahty, 45, started the Lotto syndicate five years ago and while the group has never scooped any particular huge jackpot, they did have 5 numbers on the Plus 1 last year, netting a cool €600 for the 35 members.

“Of course, every fucker came with his hand out that Monday,” said Gerahty, stacking the glasswasher.

“I was like here, Burton, you needn’t be asking where your twenty quid is, you didn’t put your three quid in for weeks. Get fucked, if you think I’m going to be covering you then you’ve another thing coming. Anyone who was paid up got a nice few quid for pints and chips, and the rest were all complaining about being left out. Ask me arse, you all get the fucking email each week”.

Admitting that at times the syndicate is more hassle than it’s worth, the Dublin native has stressed that there’ll be no more hand-holding for those who wish to play.

“I used to go chasing after people for their money, but from now on they can come to me,” asserted the barman.

“They know where I am, and there’ll be no crying about missing out if we win a few quid when they’re not in. I don’t give a fuck if you’ve paid me up for the last 30 weeks, the week we’re in is the only week that counts”.

WWN concluded the interview by wishing the government Lotto syndicate the very best of luck.