None Of Man’s 6,000 LinkedIn Emails Contain A Job Offer


AFTER carrying out a recent appraisal of a near never ending stream of LinkedIn emails, unemployed Waterford man Cian Andrews can confirm there wasn’t a single job offer among the lot.

“Oh, plenty of people want to connect with you. But, you know I wouldn’t mind being connected with a fucking job,” Andrews explained to WWN earlier today.

LinkedIn, the world’s premier professional social network is a hotbed of networking, which has led Andrews to become frustrated that of his 6,000 LinkedIn emails none of them seem to revolve around jobs.

“No, nothing, nada, zip, fuck all,” Andrews confirmed after checking his LinkedIn account.

“Just a load of lads posting ‘helpful links’ to blog posts about earning your first billion dollars, you’d almost wonder, does anyone even engage with each other on this thing,” Andrews added.

Andrews regular pleas for jobs while drawing attention to his extensive CV have been met with a number of employers sharing the posts, along with the words ‘this guy is a solid hire’.

Employment experts have confirmed Andrews may be stuck in a cycle of recruiters connecting with him on LinkedIn only to pretend he never exists once the request is accepted.