WWN Looks Back: The Year In Sport

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BALLS of all shapes and sizes were kicked, thrown, punched and sang about all throughout 2015. As the year draws to a close, Waterford Whispers take a look back at some of the year’s sporting highlights that passed the time and distracted us from our ceaseless march to the warm, welcoming grave.

There was an Olympics

In London… Wasn’t there? There wasn’t a World Cup, so that means there was an Olympics. No… 2015 is an odd number. So… was there a Winter Olympics? We’re not sure. We seem to recall a large-scale sporting event that took place over a month, and the whole country becoming experts in it. So we’ll say Olympics.

The Dubs beat the rest of the country at football

Dublins GAA team managed to win the All-Ireland final, beating off a stiff opposition in the shape of a team comprised of 465 players from the remaining 31 counties. Declaring themselves the kings of GAA, the Dubs then helped themselves to the first night with newlywed women across the country, as is their right.

Your co-worker continued to oar himself into every sport-based conversation

It wasn’t all good news on the sporting front, as that annoying lad who works with you still insisted on approaching you every Monday morning to strike up a conversation about sport, despite the fact that he knows nothing about soccer, GAA, rugby… any sport at all, really. “What about Mourhinho now?”, he beams. Fuck off Mike, seriously.

It was the Rugby World Cup!

The Rugby World Cup, not the Olympics! Our bad. Yeah, the RWC. Good times. Won by… New Zealand, right? Surely it was.

Your kids promising kite-surfing career came to a halt

After spending close to a thousand euro and dedicating every weekend for half the year to helping your 8 year old achieve his dream of becoming a world class kite surfer, the whole thing fell to ashes after he turned to you and said that he didn’t want to be a kite surfer anymore, and that kite surfing is “lame”. Still, his new-found love for orienteering is sure to last for at least another 4 months, so there’s that.

Sales of waistcoats soared

The continued rise to prominence of UFC fighter and fashionista Connor McGregor saw an unprecedented rise in the sale of tweed waistcoats, which are currently sitting at levels not seen since the War Of Independence. Meanwhile, Jose Aldo lost his place on the Clarehannis Senior GAA club team after getting knocked out with just one punch to the jaw in his clash with McGregor in Las Vegas. You won’t last a minute on the GAA pitch with that kind of performance, Jose!

Irish fans continue to be just amazing

It’s not said very often, so we at WWN just want to take a minute and say that the Irish fans are… well… (sobs) they’re the best fans in the world. Just look at them there, singing, watching football, holding up funny signs that suggest their wives don’t know where they are… God bless them, each and every one of them. Angels. Angels walking among us.

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