A Look Inside Pat Kenny’s New UTV Show

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WWN has been granted an exclusive behind the scenes look at Pat Kenny’s ‘still in development’ UTV show.

With the new broadcaster about town aiming to challenge the big guns of Irish TV, it is thought Kenny’s show provisionally titled ‘Simply Pat’ (not to be confused with the RTÉ hatchet job documentary on its ex-employee ‘Simple Pat’) is the essential piece to the ratings-busting puzzle.

I have to confess that as first impressions go, it looks set to shake Irish television to its very foundations.

“Oh, him? That’s Simon,” Pat Kenny says as he points at an elephant taking his place on a state of the art stage, “he doesn’t look like a Simon, but once you get to know him, you’ll be like ‘what an absolute Simon!’.

Simon and Pat met on the set of the Toy Show years ago and have been close friends ever since, but the host insists this is no ‘jobs for the boys’ operation.

Kenny is bright and alert, infused with a giddiness rarely seen in his days at RTÉ, what does he put that down to?

“Our first episode, though not quite there yet, is on the question of drugs in Ireland. We’re going Gonzo style journalism on it, so the team has me on a new drug every week. This week, it’s speed,” Pat explains as he begins jogging around the studio.

I jog in pursuit.

‘And what about potential guests?’ I venture, struggling to keep up with Pat as he climbs a lighting rig in the studio.

“We’re trying to keep it light, it’s an entertainment show, but I’m pushing for our first guest to be an effigy of Gay Byrne, I think we can push the budget out a bit so I can get a flamethrower. How cool would that be?”

We take up the second part of the interview in the morning where Pat has moved on to heroin as part of Simply Pat’s drugs piece. He is sluggish, but his renewed sense of purpose shines through.

“Got any banana Yazoo’s?” Pat asks, “we’ve got to keep things fresh. We could go the boring route of interviewing Twink but my biggest hope is if I can get one of the ISIS lads on and just ask what the fuck they are playing at really. That’ll be my usual tone and style”.

Musical guests for the first show include “a woman who can play the bagpipes with her you-know-what…. and Bob Dylan”.

“This isn’t just a chat show,” Pat tells me as he grabs me by the lapels, there is a danger in his eyes which could either be the heroin or just good old fashioned arousal, “this is chat-jazz, or as I like to call it: ‘Chazz’. The revolution is now”.

I, for one, await the eclectic smorgasbord of cacophonous and rhythmical erratic chat-jazz with bated breath.

Simply Pat airs on UTV Ireland sometime in April.

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