Boss Somehow Thinks You Are His Friend

SHORTLY after lunch yesterday you made the startling discover that despite no previous warning your boss, who confesses to being ‘just one of the gang’, somehow thinks that the two of you are friends.

While you had suspected somewhere in the back your mind that your boss was under the illusion that you were ‘pally’, yesterday’s events have put it beyond all doubt and mark a disturbing change to your working environment.

As you were busy doing what he pays you to do, your boss approached your desk this morning and began talking about ‘the Love, Hate’ and was enthusiastically discussing the new episode while making a clever remark about fizzy orange forcing you to stifle a laugh fearing that a failure to do so would result in your firing.

You decided to break the long drawn out silence that followed by asking had he any plans for this evening to which he responded “oh, just a bit of the eh, sex having with the wife”,

With your eyes firmly trained on a computer screen, your boss refused to leave instead favouring to hover over your shoulder in further prolonged silence as he scanned his mind for something else to say. He settled on mentioning how “you’d really notice the drop in temperature” in the last few days.

Just as you thought he had left your side, he added, “sure we’ll go for those pints you’re always on about” despite the fact you have never expressed a desire to lay your eyes on your superior outside of work.

Unbeknownst to you, your boss has also planned to ask you to go for dinner in his house next week where you will witness firsthand irrefutable evidence that his marriage to wife Deirdre is slowly crumbling.