JobBridge Intern Starting To Hallucinate As His Shift Enters 83rd Hour

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JOBBRIDGE intern and MA holder Kevin Murray is beginning to hallucinate as he continues to hold down the fort at WWN towers for an 83rd hour in a row.

Kevin has gone without sleep for over three days as he remains the only member of staff available to work today as the rest of the office recovers from an enjoyable weekend at Electric Picnic.

‘Don’t worry guys Alf is helping me out a bit’ Kevin wrote in his email to editor Paddy Browne, referring to 80’s sitcom star and friendly alien Alf who began appearing in visions to Kevin late Sunday evening.

Under strict instructions from his superiors at WWN, Kevin took on the responsibility and privilege of manning Ireland’s leading news publication for the weekend, full of excitement at being given such a great opportunity.

The Media Studies graduate made sure not to leave the reception desk throughout his still ongoing shift, wisely choosing to go without food or water and urinating in a bottle when the occasion presented itself.

Close to 50 emails Kevin sent to his superiors went unanswered over the weekend with the last known correspondence sent mentioning ‘bright dots in my vision’ and ‘retards, Mevin Kurray’.

Kevin will gain further invaluable experience throughout the week as he takes on both the morning and evening shifts until such point all traces of drugs have left his coworkers systems.

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