WIT Students Celebrate Rag Week Outside Future Fast Food Job Prospects

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HUNDREDS of Waterford students gathered outside their future fast food job prospects last night to celebrate WIT rag week, it was reported today.

An estimated 2,000 young men and women spilled onto the busy streets shortly after closing time to pay homage to their future place in society.

“Tis quair mad here so tis.” said topless Wexford man Martin Brophy. “Der’s young wans runnin’ round with their tits out and everything.

“Its like MTV spring break America or something.” he added, while climbing a sign post.

Gardai said that due to outdated closing-time laws, bus loads of scantily clad, barely legal teens swarmed Waterford’s ‘going out street’ at approximately 2am, leaving many fast food businesses inundated with orders from potential future employees.

The already under-manned, under-paid Gardai battled throughout the night to disperse the drunken crowd of kebab munchers.

Several young men resorted to climbing one fast food outlet in a bid to secure their future roles as fast food workers.

“Its all about conquering and showing the competition that this is your territory.” said Carlow young fella Tony Mackay.

Fast food business owner, Mohammed Petal, told WWN that he expects to receive CV’s from at least half of  the people he served over the past few days.

“Its a vicious circle.” he explained. “People in Ireland go to college, get drunk and abuse fast food workers like us and think its funny. Its not!

“What is funny tho is the fact that these same people will fail their exams, drop out of college and end up handing in their CV’s to us looking for work. ” he concluded.

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