Coalition Encourages Taxpayers To Donate Any Gains In Budget To Help Pay Data Centres’ Energy Bills

“YOU MIGHT still be skipping gaily down the street after finding out you’re €500 worse off in real terms, but consider those who didn’t get a wink of sleep, those running data centres which are gorging on our electricity supply,” confirmed messaging from the coalition in some post-budget 2026 comments.

The coalition has said it will be leaving donation buckets outside Leinster House for the remainder of the week for any members of the tax paying public to donate the handful of euro they may have gained to a more deserving and worthy cause.

“If you think it’s hard to heat your rural shack, imagine how tough it is to power a big metallic box storing the endless AI video requests of the horny weirdos across the world, it cost doesn’t bear thinking about,” confirmed one government TD.

“I’m as unhappy as you that the minimum wage has gone up, I voted to give that money to the sort of company who is pioneering AI chat bots which try to have sexualised conversations with children but we’ll just have to rely on you guys donating to Mark Zuckerberg in these buckets instead,” shared another coalition official.

Elsewhere, Taoiseach Micheál Martin is facing down the prospect of being confronted this evening by his party’s membership over his handling of the selection of Jim Gavin as the party’s presidential candidate.

“He’s been watching John Wick on repeat to prepare but if those moves don’t work hell be firing a bunch of empty brown envelopes on the floor and in the air and that should cause enough scrambling and fighting to distract the lads,” shared an ally of the Taoiseach.

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