Construction Halted On Social Housing Site After Discovery Of Archeologically Significant Millennium Time Capsule Buried By Primary School Children 

WORK HAS been paused on the construction of a number of social housing units after a millennium time capsule buried by primary school children in January 2000 was discovered.

“We messed up, it’s now clear it is an archeologically sensitive site. Had we known we wouldn’t have given it the green light,” confirmed one local council worker in the planning department.

The pupils who buried the capsule to mark the millennium would now be around 36 and 37 years of age but had buried it with the intention that people in the year 2100 would dig it up to see how the people of the past lived.

“There’s an official Buffy the Vampire Slayer annual in here, a considerable amount of pogs. But before excavating more, we simply must halt any notions of further construction. Artefacts, our history, our culture, our very way of life come first, it must be preserved in place for those from the future to learn from” explained a conservation expert, who admitted St Tabitha Of The One-Armed Handstand National School should have alerted the council to their decision to bury it in a field adjacent to the school.

“I don’t care about history or whatever, I just have this awful feeling I wrote a cringy poem that was included and don’t want anyone to ever get their hands on it,” said one former pupil of of STOTOAHNS, who had been protesting any moves to uproot the capsule and carry on with construction.

‘Millennium time capsule’ now joins rare bats, a leaf in the shape of a heart and ‘ugh, poor people’ as recent reasons behind the denial of planning permission for much needed housing units across Ireland.

“This isn’t is something we can just brush over like the illegal disposal of actual children in unmarked graves, this is a significant find,” confirmed the council.

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