Local Man Thought Socials Democrats Were A Band Until Last Week


ONE LOCAL Waterford reader of the news could have swore blind that the Social Democrats were one of those impossibly up-themselves post-punks bands doing the rounds and not a political party enjoying a significant surge in recent polls.

“Are they not the ones that were on Jools Holland? Dublin lads? All had that haircut where the worse it looks the more expensive it costs?” asked Dungarvan man Peter Power.

Learning that The SDs are not up for the Choice Prize this year but are in fact a left-leaning party receiving renewed press coverage after the appointment of new leader Holly Cairns, Power was keen to learn more.

“You sure they’re not The Demo Cats? This isn’t like a high concept ‘character’ David Bowie style, pop-as-propaganda pastiche? The policies read like avant garde song titles, ‘Fully Implement Slaintecare’, ‘Smart Cities’, ‘Clean Energy'”.

“Oh ‘Avant Gardaí’ would be a good name for a band, bagsie that,” continued Power as he maintained the belief that he saw Social Democrats play The Workmans once.

Power’s failure to realise the party existed has been put down to a combination of taking absolutely zero interest in any political news stories and the fact the Irish media themselves only recently discovered there are other parties aside from the coalition partners and Sinn Féin.

Elsewhere, Sinn Féin have confirmed that they hope any voters switching loose allegiance from their party aren’t too attached to their kneecaps.

“Is that Mary Lou McDonald outside our gaff?” queried one renter to their five housemates at 4.24am last night as an angry figure loitered in the driveway.