Bertie Ahern Confirms He Wholeheartedly Accepts Apology From Irish People


AFTER being asked by assembled media if he needed to ‘rehabilitate’ his image upon his reentry into Fianna Fáil and Irish political life, Bertie Ahern confirmed that he accepts the Irish public’s apology for how they wronged him.

“I wholeheartedly accept the apology. It was very moving to see the crowds line the streets and cheers ‘Bertie for president’,” explained Ahern, mistaking a warm reception at a small Fianna Fáil party event attended by craven invertebrates who care only about their own self-advancement and bank balance for being representative of the entirety of Ireland.

Footage of the stomach turning event has caused many to vomit uncontrollable as they watched the enthusiastic round of applause received by the disgraced politician.

“It was very gracious if a little late,” Ahern said, humbled by what he hallucinated as a sincere and lengthy apology by the nation which included flowers.

Asked again if being labeled among the malign and corrupt influences in Irish politics in the last half century would hamper him in any way, Ahern responded “I agree, it’s rare a whole nation apologises to someone they’ve wronged but even the cribbers and moaners offered to wash my feet by way of apology”.

Elsewhere, the public continue to ask Fianna Fáil ‘are you serious with this bullshit? Is this a prank?’