Mum Cooks Her Signature Pompeii Pasta

A COUNTY Waterford mother who has been up to her eyes pottering around the house has unknowingly whipped up her signature Italian dish, Pompeii pasta, WWN reports.

Coined due to its charcoal black appearance and its unforgettable ash aroma, the fragrant recurring meal gave the O’Neill home a smell like it had just been preserved in volcanic debris, sparking full-time son-of-two Dermot O’Neill to intervene.

“Mam, I think the pasta is done,” the 13-year-old updated the bed-changing chef/cleaner/gardener, Sheila O’Neill, who cannot for the life of her remember putting on the classic carcinogenic meal. Now cursing manically from the bottom bedroom Sheila delivered her signature “Aw for fuck sakes” response, a slogan no doubt deserving of her Pompeii dish ever made it to the supermarket shelves.

“Fucking cunt on it anyway,” the mother of three added, now retiring a blackened stainless-steel saucepan to the bin, “lads, ye’re going to have to start learning how to cook your own pasta, mammy can’t be doing everything all the time,” she added, knowing this will never happen as long as she can walk on her own two feet.

Despite its exotic name, Pompeii pasta is relatively easy to make, requiring just 200 grams of penne pasta, barely enough water to cover it and nothing else added but time and the top gas mark on your stove.