Waterford Woman Insists On Talking To Her Dog Like It’s A Person



WATERFORD woman Shauna Casey has continued to talk to her dog like it’s a real person despite growing opposition from the rest of Irish society.

Miss Casey, regularly seen walking her terrier-beagle-rottweiler cross Chester, has been asked on several occasions by friends and family to resist the urge to talk to her dog but she stubbornly refuses to acquiesce.

“Sure, I can’t stop talking to Chester, can I Chester? Not since we always have such great chats,” Miss Casey said in front of people who know full well dogs have historically lacked the ability to replicate and master human speech.

Chester, a loyal but licking-his-arse-focused dog has yet to respond to his owners constant communication despite Miss Casey’s assertion that ‘only Chester gets me’.

Talking to animals in a high-pitched voice as if they were children with learning difficulties has long been a sign of madness but in recent years society has been less judgemental of people like Miss Casey.

“I think people got tired of pointing out how insane people looked while doing it,” explained vet and dog psychologist Liam McNally, “but little thought is spared for the psychological impact on the dogs”.

McNally went on to explain crippling anxiety dogs suffer at constantly being asked ‘who’s a good boy?’, ‘where’s your ball?’ and 5,000 other rhetorical questions they will never learn the answer to.

“I don’t torture you with constant questions, do I Chester? No, no, that’s right, I don’t,” responded Miss Casey chillingly.