“Eight Additional Data Centres Needed To Store Pictures Of Irish Snow” Energy Watchdog Warns

THE COMMISSION FOR Regulation of Utilities in Ireland has called on the public to refrain from taking yet more photos of the snow as server capacities reach breaking point.

“Data centres already consume a huge amount of our electricity, but Meta will need to break ground on another eight data centres if you keep uploading those photos of your snowman with a carrot for a dick,” cautioned the energy watchdog.

Usually limiting itself to providing a free complaint resolution service, the CRU has felt the need to speak out before the energy grid buckles under the weight of picturesque landscape photos accompanied by the word ‘sneactha’.

“We all know what snow fucking looks like lads, you’ve already taken 150 pictures of it, that’s enough. And anyway, they’re likely out of focus and partially covered by your fat fingers. The world will survive without your visual documentation of it all,” a CRU spokesperson added, as the light caught their face just right amid a background of beautiful cascading snow which acted as cotton wool blanket pulled over the nearby hills.

“You better not be taking a fucking picture of me,” insisted the spokesperson, as this reporter’s iPhone camera’s flash went off brighter than a Chinese New Year fireworks display.

UPDATE: The CRU also urged the public to be mindful of the carbon footprint created by taking 400 photos of your pets every hour, and the impact of giving a thumb’s up emoji to every single WhatsApp message you receive.

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