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US Proves There’s Nowhere They Can’t Bomb
NASA’s successful mission to crash a spacecraft onto a distant asteroid has been heralded as a complete success, and proof ... -
Space Big As Fuck, Confirm Scientists
THE first images returned by the James Webb telescope have confirmed what many have believed for years; space is big, ... -
NASA Admit James Webb Telescope Just A Really Cool Way To Get Screensavers
THE most powerful telescope ever created by mankind has reached its final destination some 1 million miles away from Earth, ... -
Shatner Sent To Work In Amazon Factory Until He Pays Back Cost Of Space Flight
AFTER the overwhelming and euphoric adrenaline rush slowly receded from his body, Captain Kirk aka William Shatner aka The Oldest ... -
Jeff Bezos Still A Wanker, Agrees World
ALTHOUGH the world has admitted that the footage of 90-year-old Star Trek actor William Shatner floating in zero-gravity on board ... -
Livid Tom Cruise Banging On Outside Of Russian Spacecraft
BANGING angrily on the outside of the Russian spacecraft carrying the crew which beat out the Mission Impossible actor to ... -
“4,700 Virgin Atlantic Job Losses Worth It” Branson Confirms From Space
MOMENTS before reentering the Earth’s atmosphere, billionaire Richard Branson personally thanked all 4,700 former Virgin Atlantic employees terminated in the ... -
Buzz Aldrin Free To Make Up Any Old Shit Now
BUZZ Adlrin, the last surviving crew member of the historic Apollo 11 moon landing mission, has spoken out following the ... -
NASA Accused Of Using Drone To Perv On Mars
PERVERTS working at NASA have today been slammed for using a drone to stalk the red planet, WWN has learned. ... -
Mars Rover To Self-Isolate For 14 Days Before Exploring Planet
NASA’s groundbreaking Perseverance rover has touched down on the surface of Mars, where it will now remain in isolation for ... -
Japan Advised 2020 Probably Not Best Year To Be Bringing Asteroid Dust From Space
JAPANESE scientists are being asked if now is really the time to be examining asteroid dust collected by the Hayabusa-2 ... -
‘Call Us When You Find Oil’, NASA Told
NASA’s ‘big news’ about the discovery of water on the moon has been met with a resounding ‘meh’ from humanity, ...
