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Pope Settles In For ‘Simply Divine’ Evening Of Watching ‘Moral Pleasures’ On Pornhub
AFTER declaring that pleasures such as a well-cooked meal or loving sexual intercourse to be “divine” following decades of overzealous ... -
God Realises He’s Been Playing ‘Earth’ On Hard Mode This Whole Time
“HA! Would you look at that! I was just thinking things aren’t normally this difficult,” laughed God earlier today, after ... -
“You Had Me At Muslims”
LOCAL Patriot Dennis O’Mahon didn’t need to read past the ‘Muslim’ bit of the headline ‘Major Muslim Festival To Be ... -
The Untold History Of The Angelus
PIPPING Coronation Street to the title of ‘Longest Running TV Show In The World’ by a full six months, The ... -
Blackrock Church Had Signed Permission Slip From God To Carry Out Mass
REASONABLE people everywhere have hit back at those who rushed to criticise a south Dublin church for staging a series ... -
Sisters Of Charity Acting Like We Should Be Grateful
DESPITE overseeing for-profit illegal adoptions which ripped children away from their mothers who they placed in indentured servitude, religious order ... -
First Communion Kids Apply For Covid Payment
THE GOVERNMENT is today answering questions from a union of First Communion-aged boys and girls from across the country who ... -
It’s An Easter Miracle! Convicted Child Abuse Priest Set Free In Australia
CATHOLICS looking for a sign that their conveniently non-interventionist God is trying to send them a positive message and improve ... -
Church To Send Collection Basket Directly To Houses To Keep Parishioners Safe
THERE was good news for panicked parishioners today, after a report from the Catholic Church stating that it would absolve ... -
Netflix Greenlights ‘The Two Popes 2: Pope Harder’
WITH hundreds of viewers and two Academy Awards nominations in the bag, it seems people can’t get enough of Netflix’s ... -
New Research Reveals Jesus Was Short, Fat Man With Stubby Little Toes
SINCE pictorial depictions of Christ Our Saviour began, there has been consistent, recurring physical features which have echoed down the ... -
We Investigate Cavan Cult ‘Children Of The Quinn’
WITH numbers of practicing Catholics in Ireland dwindling by the day, many desperate people have resorted to joining a growing ...
