England have booked their place in the semi finals of the World Cup after a 2-0 win against Sweden and we’re never going to hear the end of this, are we? The Swedish team, who gave England very few problems, were said to be devastated at full time after the referee informed them that in… Read more »
FOOTBALL fans, brimming with excitement for today’s World Cup quarter final clashes, who are searching for expert analysis need look no further than WWN’s dedicated sports team. We size up today’s 3pm and 7pm kick offs and speculate on how it will all play out. France v Uruguay: To combat players crowding the referee like… Read more »
THE MAFIA has been quick to distance themselves from comparisons to football’s governing body FIFA after it emerged two witnesses in a corruption case against former FIFA executives have turned up dead in recent days, WWN confirm. “Hey now, don’t drag our names into this, you’re making us look bad,” confirmed mafia spokesmademan Tony Palatino,… Read more »
A REVENUE generating measure sought by the Irish public will see our good-natured football supporters sold to the highest bidder on eBay, with the highly anticipated auction closing at midnight tonight. Starting at an opening bid of €100 million, The Green Army, has had only one previous owner, Ireland, but has acquitted itself well at… Read more »
AFTER a dismal display at tonight’s World Cup qualifier in the Aviva stadium, the entire nation of Ireland has decided to call it a day and announce its retirement from international football, declaring its intention to ‘finally get its shit together and get on with its life’. Binning hundreds of thousands worth of merchandise, ranging… Read more »
IRELAND have one foot in the World Cup after securing a thrilling edge of the seat 0-0 draw with a Denmark team that refused the free-flowing football Ireland is becoming synonymous with. Critics have confirmed there is every hope Ireland v Denmark at the Aviva can be the Godfather Part II of World Cup playoffs,… Read more »
THE FIRST LEG of Ireland’s triumphant victory against Denmark is but a few hours away, and WWN’s sports experts are on hand to weigh up the opposition and assess the Irish squad preparedness. Dangerman: Christian Eriksen, Spurs metronomic midfield maestro is head and shoulders above every Irish player currently playing football, but thanks to Eamon… Read more »
WAR! GENOCIDE! FAMINE! SOME MORE WAR AGAIN! Few, if any events in human history can rival the anguish and devastation wrought by the destructive handball carried out by French war criminal Thierry Henry; war, famine and genocide are indeed three of the things that simply pale in comparison. It was like a bomb went off,… Read more »
WWN has all the latest from the action at the World Cup in Brazil. Brazilian born Portuguese player Pepe finally admitted to being a sleeper agent for his homeland after his idiotic sending off against Germany yesterday. Brazilian coaching staff activated a switch in Pepe’s brain, which saw him become detached from reality and act… Read more »
WWN brings you all the latest on the action from Brazil. Switzerland scored two goals in their match against Ecuador with the final score standing at 2-1. Due to Switzerland’s neutral status the nation’s parliament had to put in place emergency legislation which allowed their team to attack. Despite scoring a wonder-goal last night some… Read more »