Met Éireann Issue Sticky Scrotum Warning For Remainder Of This Week

WEATHER forecasters are giving a ‘sticky scrotum warning’ for the remainder of this week, with temperatures set to reach into the high 20s, it has been revealed.

Clammy, moist patches will appear around many male crotches later today, and are expected to last right through to the end of the week.

Met Éireann have advised men across the country against ‘free-balling’, as their scrotums may stick against the inside of their leg.

“Wearing good fitting under clothes is half the battle,” said forecaster Gerard Flemming. “Containment of the ball sack region is a must in these high temperatures – especially when wearing baggy shorts or swimming trunks.”

An estimated 3,000 men are admitted to A&E every year with chapped testicles and other temperature related skin problems in the crotch region.

Met Éireann is also giving a yellow alert ‘nipple friction’ warning for women on Monday, where temperatures could soar into the 30 degree mark.