FORMER EU Agriculture and Rural Development Commissioner Phil Hogan has quickly stepped in to offer his services following news Justice Minister Helen McEntee is to take something called ‘maternity leave’, which is apparently time off work in lieu of giving birth to a baby human, WWN has learned. Skulking around outside Leinster House, Mr. Hogan,… Read more »
A VISIBLY frustrated Phil Hogan has expressed his disappointment in the Irish people who have yet to formally apologise for ruining what was otherwise a very pleasant visit to Ireland and a real stomper of a night out with the lads at last week’s golf dinner in Galway. “I’m too busy getting ready to save… Read more »
IN AN emotional apology to the people of Ireland over his attendance at a golfing event in Galway last Wednesday which broke all covid-19 lockdown rules, an embarrassed and sheep eyed Phil Hogan pleaded with the Irish public for forgiveness, WWN can report. “Listen, Big Phil is a big jet-setter now, travelling from country to… Read more »
GREETED with a huge round of applause from his EU Commission peers, a bloodied Phil Hogan brandished a large kitchen knife in the air after slaughtering an Irish born calf on the parliament floor, in a move to symbolise cutting ties with Irish farmers and his reappointment as EU Commissioner for another five years. “Irish beef is dead, viva la South… Read more »
UNEMPLOYED vermin nationwide will be put to work on designated cotton picking farms in a new government back to work scheme, the Minister for the Environment Phil Hogan has revealed today. More than 800 dole recipients are to start work on plantations around Dublin as part of a national scheme to make it look like… Read more »
CUTTING hedges, digging ditches and cleaning sewerage drains could all come part of the social welfare claimants daily working routine in 2014, according to Minister for the Environment Phil Hogan today. Chain gangs of unemployed people who failed to find work will take up new positions in local authorities from early next year, carrying out… Read more »